Trauma release tools | Mindfulness Mindset | Holistic Therapy
What does it actually mean, that you are enough?
This is on my mind a lot lately, as my inner world shifts so rapidly that my outer life cannot keep up!
It’s difficult to elaborate on that, as my inner world is currently quite intangible. I’ve been meditating a lot. Thinking, writing, being, not striving. It’s a new space for me to be in after a difficult decade of the struggle of single parenting and putting food on the table for my three kids.
My current experience has led me to really consider what kind of meaning my work has, or my life has for that matter!
In the midst of all this ruminating, my grandmother passed away at the age of 94. I was asked to write her obituary, which ended up being a very emotional experience for me.
As I wrote her obituary, I was struck by this contrast: how short her list of ‘things she did’ was and also, by just how large the impact of her love was.
That is to say, she didn’t ‘do’ much in the world, not in the way that we (especially women) strive to do things in my generation. She had no career, and very few hobbies. No list of ‘accomplishments’ that anyone would put on a blog post, or resume.
She had two best girlfriends she spent all her time with, laughing and comforting each other through life’s ups and downs, including widowhood. I remember laughing how when one of her besties moved interstate, they’d still have a glass of wine together over the telephone every day for ‘happy hour’!
She looked after me several days a week when I was young. Her home and heart were always open, and I never truly appreciated that despite her sometimes quirky (and sometimes ornery) personality, she gave me unconditional love, dinner, and a safe and nurturing place to be.
All these thoughts and more have touched me over the past few weeks as I’ve navigated my gradually diminishing focus on doing, and my ever-expanding interest in being.
As I wrote to my Instagram community, life, and that includes your life, and my life – the meaning of it, the meaning we give it, has never been about what you or I ‘accomplish’ or how we spend our 9-5 days or whether we have a relationship, a house we own, and so on.
You (me, all of us – but I’m going to speak about you now):
Your essence, your embodied soul, your personality and talents and struggles and your ever-evolving self-awareness and transcendence – is art.
I’ll get back to that in a moment.
Increasingly, I value the contribution of simply being:
The open-hearted listener.
She who struggled and overcame and feels peace.
The early morning cuddler of small loving dog.
She who laughs as the cat attempts to attack daughter’s crochet yarn. 😂
The shopper of food to feed my hungry teenagers.
The one who adores the stillness of solitude and meditation.
Back to ‘art’.
I just think that living is an artform. It’s not a race. It’s not a test. It’s an opportunity to take the ingredients given you by birth, by trauma and struggle, by epiphany and self-reflection, and craft it into your unique self.
Be the you you’ve dreamt of. Follow your desires. Do what you have to when you have responsibilities or obligations, but don’t lose yourself in the doing. Remember yourself in the being. That’s where you are truly to be found.